Mighty Lord Valkur, Captain of Waves!
Pug offers Valkur glory! Pug offers wild adventure and flying colours! Pug wandered sea of clouds back-o-beyond the world and smote giants of flesh and stone with thunderous might! Pug pressed Cloud Giant into service! Pug’s crew were becalmed with blethering… Pug rode great white bear of northern coasts, and full and by, laid into bilge of flying iceberg fortress! Pug and crew came into the cold hold and abreast of giant black dragon, and were not afeard (though Cloud Giant, the yellow rat, deserted)! Pug drove cutlass into dragon in killing blow, in sacrifice to Mighty Valkur! Pug found great booty in ice, and tore it out, and found useless horn. Pug give useless horn to small crewman. Pug and crew climb, and climb, and climb aloft and discover poorly guarded bird dinner! Bird dinner was e’t, but grog was spilled on stairs… Pug continues search for villains in silly togs and evil dragons to kill! To save the world! For glory! For the seas! For Valkur!